January 8, 2013

Blogging... Is... Weird

Weird. I don't know how else to describe blogging other than it's just plain weird. We do it for so many reasons, but we do it nonetheless. Sharing our lives, our creations, things we covet etc. I've made so many amazing friends because of this blog, and I'm so grateful for my friendships that I wouldn't have otherwise. 

This past week, a friend received an email from an individual who took it upon herself to point out grammatical mistakes on her blog and how her lack of proofreading made reading her blog so difficult. It did not sit well with my friend. It did not sit well with myself or our fellow bloggers either. The fact that someone had taken the time to write such an email boggles my mind. Imagine sitting down to craft an email, berating someone you don't know with your unwarranted suggestions. It takes quite a lot of effort to be that cruel, no? Plus the idiot couldn't even write her email without grammatical errors. Good job. Bravo. Well done.

I would NEVER flat out correct someone. That was David Foster Wallace's lot in life... to be the annoying Grammar Police. Besides, he's forgiven because he was a beautiful writer. And always grammatically correct, mind you. I'm sure my own writing is riddled with mistakes.

Sometimes I get comments that I should have more quilting content. That I should have this or do that or blah blah blah. I also get emails asking me to give full instructions on how I did this or that. If I have the information readily available, I'm happy to pass along the information. But let me tell you about my creative process. I rarely write anything down. When I make a quilt, I scribble the math on pieces of paper, and when the quilt is done, the paper either gets lost in the mountain of mess in my studio, or it goes in the bin. It's pretty stupid, but that's how I work. A lot of times the emails are just demands. I appreciate that you like my work, but it's unfair to ask me write you a full pattern for nothing. It makes me feel like a massive bitch when I have to tell someone I don't know where the information is, but it's always the truth. 

I started this blog with no idea what it could bring or become. I was in a new land, no friends, nothing to do... I'm a writer, so the blog seemed like the obvious choice. It has gone from things I like, to knitting (for about half a minute), to quilting, and now there's bits of photography. There's no telling what my ADD-riddled brain will like next. This has never been just a quilting blog. This is an Audrie blog. It's my words, from my head and heart. I don't write for anyone but me, and you'll just have to be okay with that :)

We write our blogs for the love of it, not for monetary gain (well, mostly) and definitely not to please anyone. At least I hope not. I love my readers. I appreciate every single one of them. They've been good to me, and it still boggles my mind that people read what I write (I know I say this a lot, but it's true). So for someone to seek one of us out like that is just so unnecessary. If you don't like it, click on the little 'x' in the corner. I promise no one will lose sleep over it. A friend got told that she should write her FREE tutorials a bit better. How about 'thank you' instead? 

People hide behind the veil of the Internet and say things they would never say to that someone's face. Always ask yourself before you hit send... Would I say this to their face? Would I want someone to say this to me? And always remember what your momma taught you... if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. 

Bottom line: We love and appreciate our readers. We love that you learn things from us, that you like what we do. But we are just people. People with jobs, families, lives, chores. We are not a faceless corporation that is here to serve. 

I don't normally write posts like that but I hate seeing my friends get crapped on for no reason at all. I will step off my soapbox now. 

36 comments:

Donna said...

I'm happy to read what you feel like sharing and always enjoy! Keep on keeping' on and feel free to delete or ignore the negativity that might cross your bloggy path. I hope your friend was also inundated with lots of positivity to help erase the rudeness of one. Maybe it's good that there's an incident like this every once in awhile in our little blog community to remind us all that one of our commonalities is the desire to be supported and to support each other. FYI, I scribble math and quilting scribbles on misc envelopes and then have the darnedest time finding them if I need to revisit my notes. :-)

Melissa said...

So sorry for your friend's experience....even tho I try to see the best in people, some are just crabby! I LOVE blogs, they are as different as the folks who write them and I appreciate the less than perfect spelling, etc. it's what makes them unique. Keep up the great blog posts!

mascanlon said...

I wish I could say I was surprised but the rudeness of people never ceases to amaze me! I don't write a blog for a lot of reasons but mostly because I work 40+ hours out of the home and only have a limited time to spend at my sewing machine and I am too selfish to give it up to blog. So I so appreciate the time and effort those of you who do make the time I do not to blog. I love the inspiration and feeling like I am part of a larger community passionate about our love for fabric and creating things. And I try never to take for granted all the work you and many others put into photos, writing, tutorials and just making me laugh. So I try to say thank you often and to comment often on my favorite blogs. Thank you, I appreciate all you share Audrie. And I try to admire the stately cats!

Jan said...

One of my best blogging friends is a teacher, well educated, but her posts are full or errors. I don't care, I know she's in a hurry and super excited, and I can always figure out what she meant. I think it's one of her charms.

Kathy MacKie said...

Well said Audrie!

CitricSugar said...

Amen, sistah! Thanks for always keeping it real. And for standing up to meanies. imma splling this kommint rong on porpose to demonstrait my solidarity with fellow bloggers against rudeness and ingratitute!

Sandra (Cherry Heart) said...

Amen to that! Sorry to your friend, I hope she's not too hurt by someone's stupidity and make sure you keep up your 'Audrie-ness', it's what we love after all!

S x

PS - CitricSugar - lol!

Merran said...

platforms like instagram, flikr and blog comments are a potential minefield. I so often wish I could say something funny or clever like so many but when I try I inevitably delete it in case it comes over wrong. Maybe some people just dont have filters? and maybe I over- filter but better that than offend someone I reason.

At least once a year I read of an incident like this and bloggers questioning themselves and their work, Maybe its necessary so people do get to talk about this stuff and shifts the game up a bit?

Anyway you dont need us to tell you how much we enjoy your posts, pics etc..

Alexandra P. said...

I like your blog a lot! It's full of nice pictures and you often make me laugh. I'm very grateful that you want to spend so much time to show us beautiful things and to amuse us with your funny stories. Please, do carry on!
Greeting from Belgium,
Alexandra

ShellyG said...

I love your blog! Ya know why? Like you Audrie I love to quilt, but I love they way you share your kitty cats, food, funny convos with your hubby, heartache from family - its all life. Its real, and it's what we on the other side of the screen are all living through too. By the way my method of planning a quilt is the same - rough sketch - go for it and good luck finding some sort of instructions under the pile of scraps! I find blogs a source of inspiration and anything I take away from them I am so grateful and pay it forward when I can. Keep up the great work, afterall, we should be thanking you for sharing your world with us! Michelle from Oz x

Kate said...

So true and well said, I was just thinking about this today after getting another email with a demand to just tell them how to change a tutorial to suit them without even a please.I think people forget that bloggers are people with their own lives and things going on.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for always making me smile, even on my worst days. OK maybe not this post, but most of them. Take care. Jen

Pennie said...

Well said!

Chris said...

Bravo and well said Audrie!

Elsa said...

What happened to your friend seems to happen all to often ~ I've heard it from other bloggers and it's why I stopped blogging. I think some people have too much time on their hands and say stupid things. We are just regular people doing something we really enjoy. Thanks for addressing the issue.

Sandra said...

hi,
I feel sad that this happened to your blogger friend; people are taking blogs too seriously, after all it's "having a chat on the computer....", it's not a reference library where everyone has to be serious and things have to be "grammatically correct". Some people are too quick to critize when they should be happy they can use this awesome "resource" .
I think we should be able to see that persons post so we can ALL give her(him) our opinion on what "they" said.
Audrie, we love your postings/blog, keep doing what you're doing (for as long as you want to ).
We appreciate you girl!!
(and I'f I'm ever THAT person~feel free to tell me....)

Poppy Seed Arts said...

Bravo! and well said!! You really tell it like it is (or should be) and that's what we readers love about your blog. Keep it coming. Also I am so sorry about your friend's experience. But please try not to spend time thinking about it, its just not worth it! It takes all kinds of people to make this world and quite a few of them are rude to put it mildly. Like my oh-so-wise 17-yr-old says, "Brush it off like you would a piece of lint from your coat"!!

Valerie said...

How disappointing that someone would complain about grammatical errors or imperfect tutorials on a blog! Apparently people forget that a blog is for enjoyment! If it is too much "work" for the reader, then they can quit reading it! No one is making them do it! I love reading your blog, Audrie. Regardless of the content, it is always entertaining - and that's what a blog is all about! :-)

Regina said...

I love your "Audrie blog" and look forward to every entry. Keep on, girl!

Cindy said...

Very well said, Audrie!! Love your blog just the way it is and people should be more appreciative!!

Lisa C said...

I am extremely sorry for your friend. How awful to be attacked for something as senseless as that when she's putting herself out there expecting nothing in return.

Darcy said...

People are really, truly bizarre aren't they? It would never in a million years occur to me to write someone about their grammar or for that matter anything else I didn't like about their blog, I'd just stop reading. I think all we can do is try to shake off the stupidity and bitterness and keep doing what we enjoy. And I enjoy your blog AND your friend's blog!

Kara @me_and_elna said...

PEOPLE ARE SO FREAKING STUPID!!! Just because these are words on a screen to be read doesn't mean there's not a real soul behind the keyboard that typed them... I think people- the stupid ones- often forget that. If you ever see that email writer in person, kick her in the knees for me.

Kristy said...

And this is one reason why I love to read your blog. You are honest and real.

Cori said...

Ugh! People! Thankfully, in my six-plus years of blogging, I haven't had to deal with too much crap from people. I did have one guy who spent far too long explaining to me that I didn't use the correct definition of the word "decadent." I was like, really dude? Of all things? Why don't you get off the internet and perhaps get a girlfriend and DO things with your life, instead of being annoying on the internet. Again, I say ugh!

Claudia said...

Loved your post, and I agree....some people need a life if they have nothing better to do than pick on others.
I also blog....about this and that or nothing at all.
I read LOTS of blogs and I enjoy them all. Wishing you a great week...and I look forward to your blog no matter what you write about.
Take Care.

Averil said...

Well since you're discussing it, I want to make my demands known:

1. Needs more Bieber
2. Blog colour scheme should be RAINBOW EXPLOSION!
3. Stop talking about quilts entirely, and blog solely about scrunchies and the many ways to wear a scrunchie.
4. Tutorials need to be more descriptive, in that I wanna know when you took pee breaks, scratched your butt or blew your nose.
5. Pictures should always have bokeh, even in bright day light.

Now get to meeting my demands or else I'll write some bitchy emails and make snarky comments on all your posts. Now GIT!


Your favouritest sister,
Ave.

karen @ badlandsquilts said...

I don't like Facebook but did see a good share today... Photo of the globe saying the world has X billion people so why would you ever let 1 person ruin your day...

RyanSarahN said...

I love your blog and all your content - whether quilty or otherwise, it always puts a smile on my face. Thanks for sharing.

Nini said...

Your blog is my favorite of all the quilting blogs I read, for various and assorted reasons. I get a kick out of your musical bent (I like a lot of the same music you do, plus the stuff your parents like!); your travels and photos; even your cats, though I'm a dog person. For anyone to try to squash a creative person, shows their lack of appreciation for the trials and tribulations that go in to design and writing and posting, etc. I appreciate some one else opening my eyes to more then I can see in my daily life, so I want you to know I appreciate your willingness to share. Please let your friend know how I feel, since I'd hate for her to decide to get out of the blogging business because of some uneducated blobs.

VeeV said...

excellent soapbox!!!!

Christina said...

:)

Jolie said...

Audrie, blogging is weird, but you are one of my most favourite weirdos! ;)
It does seem a bit of mind-farckery to go to a blog (the writer's *voice* if you will) and then take exception to hearing their voice. morons. as for making demands...wow. I remember being asked so often at craft fairs for the pattern of the baby hats I was selling. For free of course. Palm, meet forehead.
I love seeing what you're willing to share, when you're willing to share it, even if I am far too much of a quiet stalker than a commenter! I hope your friend is able to bounce back...the other person's problem is exactly that - *their* problem!

jeifner said...

I also love your blog. You're convo's with your husband never cease to crack me up. Now, don't beat me about the head here, I would hope we can leave room for helpful criticism without being automatically labeled "stupid...rude, [ingrate], attacker or moron" Etc. I think it becomes a problem when we are not polite or are mean, demanding or insulting. I once emailed someone, in my field, about an instructional post. He misused words. He used several variations of the word, each having a different meaning and it did make it very hard to understand. I was polite as can be and was just seeking clarification and recieved back an expletive laced email that basically told me to shove off. There was no need for that. I don't know what your friend recieved and hope it wasn't terrible like that. It is sad that she was hurt and understandable if it was so bad. So let's all remember to keep our adult brain in place, give a little leeway and keep it polite.

Claudia said...

Love everything you write- be it right or wrong! I am just saying Thank You to you because I am happy that you do it all! It's fun, it's inspirational and it's you. Sending you greetings from Germany

Kristal LeTodd said...

I love this post! I love your blog! (Which I just found today, and have been scrolling through out the bits of free time today) I love your work! I recently started quilting after quiting
my job which I was very unhappy with, and
became so excited that just a few weeks ago
I decided to start a blog to document my
journey and my progress. I have only had the
courage to post two posts because of the fear of criticism to my writting and grammar. English is my second language and I am daily faced with the challenge of people giggleling or making funny remarka about the way I say things. I do not have a thick accent just a different way of expressing myself, different
word choices. Your post was very inspiring and reassuring that I am not doing this for other people. Unhappy people will always find a way to put happy people down. Let's not the them stop us. Thank you!

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